Starcraft 2 players do nothing but cry about bad manners

So I started playing this map called Zealot Hockey.  No offense to Dota 2 but that shit was old news and not challenging anymore. I had previously made it a small mission in my life to prove that calm logic and charisma beat out angry, insolent Aspergers any day of the week.  Since right now I’m casually sitting at 4800 after playing once every 3 weeks, randoming every game, and not caring, while Ravens fights for his life every game in the 4200 bracket, I’m gonna go ahead say “Mission Accomplished, son”.  The kid’s just not any good.  So I went and installed the big game SC2 4 years after it’s release.

I drop into this custom map Zealot Hockey, which is actually quite fun.  Its dynamic, creative, challenging, and 20 games into it there are still tricks to learn.  But even better than smashing at this game is taking kids out of their box and their comfort zone and making them mad as fuck while you drop the big slam on them.

Let me explain.  Basically in this game, if you’re good, when you’re on  a 1 on 1 breakaway with the keeper, there’s a 80% chance you’re going to score.  Till someone pauses the game real quick and then unpauses, throwing off your rhythm.  That’s a completely new element to the game that I brought in, many years after these idiots have been grinding it for a living, trying their same old moves like broken tapes.  INNOVATION AT IT’S FINEST.  Yet somehow I’m a bad guy for doing it…


Watch live video from Zealothockey on Twitch

The best part about Starcraft 2 nerds is the way they cry.  There is this culture about Starcraft 2, this stupid fucking culture where people think they need to be so fucking mannered and respectful 24-7.  Yet these same kids, who are so quick to perpetuate the culture by crying “BM” or “BANLIST”, are the same ones who will start flaming you themselves, dropping their own bad manners, just because you played in a different way than is culturally acceptable to them.  QUID PRO QUO?  Idiots.  No one gives a fuck about your stupid fucking socially awkward sensitive bullshit culture.  Just cause I hit the pause fucking button at a crucial moment doesn’t make me less of a sportsman than you son.  The whole fucking GAME is about pushing buttons on a computer.  Think outside the fucking box.  There’s no gamesmanship on the internet.  All of the internet, indeed all of life itself is a game.  If you ain’t #winning, you ain’t winning.  Think about it.

The best part about this shit is when you play ladder.  I don’t know any of these stupid fucking Starcraft 2 units (honestly why’d they change everything from sc1), so I just cannon rush every game.  THESE KIDS GET SO MAD ABOUT CANNON RUSH.  AS IF ITS NOT A LEGITIMATE STRATEGY.  They even have a word for it.  “CHEESE”.  It’s so cheesy to play in a different way than I personally find comfortable.  LOL.

Needless to say, in actuality every part of the game is carefully balanced.  If you can’t survive a cannon rush, aren’t I taking advantage of some weakness in your own play that is so easily exploitable?  Everything is relative, you fucking moron.  These kids just look up builds and strats online from their favorite pro player or twitch tv personality, try for some zerg early expand or other rush stalker bullshit, fully expecting to stay in their comfort zone the entire game.  But you throw one wrench in the plans and they fall apart completely, despite their massive experience advantage and wealth of knowledge of the game.  It’s like the dumbass British, who wanted to fight in their red coats whilst drinking tea in nice formations, right before the rebel colonists popped out of the forest and ambushed those fuckers with GUERRILA WARFARE SON.

Just picked up the game and I’m smashing your platinum dumb ass.  The cry you see in SC2 is like if someone in Dota legitimately cried every time a Lycan or Furion backdoored you, instead of just getting good and realizing how to counter that play.

Fuck it, that shit happens too, so what am I even talking about?

    62 Comments

    • Lighting_King says:

      KID UNINSTALL YOU’RE CRYHARD GET GOOD THEN WE’LL TALK BALL SUCKING.

    • JEABONG says:

      kid good thing u havent played LoL, you can get chat muted there for saying “EZ” when you win a game LOL, because RIOT legitimately thinks its toxic

    • Deadspacemoon says:

      FAT SLOBS:King Raven, who art in DRD; big be thy plays. Thy stream is live, pubs will be crushed on Dire as they are in Radiant. Give us this stream our daily mad, and forgive us our dodge bets, as we forgive those who dodge against us, and lead us not into 3k, but deliver us from publics. Solomid.

    • disgusting pub says:

      Quality post. Please more.

    • swagbreaker says:

      people still play sc2?

    • bitchass punk says:

      need some screens with mad

    • Demon_Steve says:

      First quality post to this site in some time. This prissy ass mannered shit needs to go, I agree. We’ve given the thought police our schools, our hospitals, and our governments. We are raising a nation of fags. Please don’t give them the internet too. Please, everyone go out of your way to racially slur some dumb kid in the next game you play. At the very least you’ll get the kid to put down his low calorie monster energy drink so he can type “muted”.

    • Shaddonius says:

      HEH HEH HEH HEHITY HEH HEH HEH HEHITY HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH, ME AND YOUR FESTERING LITTLE SISTER ARE HUFFING WITH SOME SO SMALL YOU NEED AN ELECTRON MICROSCOPE COUNTERBUTTHOLES HEH HEHITY HEH HEH HEH HEH HEHITY HEH HEH HEHITY HEH HEH.

    • [Riot] Nome says:

      Never heard of you.

    • Dicksmash says:

      HEH I GUESS ANOTHER SHITKID GOT HIS E-PENIS SHRUNK AND CANT LEARN SHIT FROM LOSSES.
      do they even lift?

    • JEABONG says:

      DURR DERP DERP FART DURR FART FART DERP HURR HURR LONG DONGED FED PLANTCAVEMANS.

    • Jason says:

      a friend and i had this discussion (about how everything in life can be successfully approached as a game) – and we ended up trying to think of things that were so serious (or maybe, so complex) that they could not be successfully approached as a game. i thought maybe my life goal of attaining self actualization might qualify, but it turned out that this, too, could be treated as a game.

      the conversation ended when one of us suggested League of Legends might be an example of same. HEH

    • JEABONG says:

      lmao kids where did ravens newest madcast article go away? cyber kid got put away?

      • windoze says:

        Kid deleted all of his articles.

        If only there was a place where you could look up old versions of any website.

        • Deadspacemoon says:

          Kid deleted his stream u dirty pubs how much did he get mad last night i went to bed?

          • Medium Sized Meng says:

            Some small sons got into the chat last night before I logged on and really pissed off the King… After I got there it sounded as if Windoze talked Raven down, but Raven ended up deleting everything.

            As for the mad… When I was there it didn’t sound all that mad. He sounded annoyed but not shut down everything mad.

        • Trales says:

          kid xp go stream we need you ShaddFace

      • Trales says:

        What the fuck happened. Give us back the stream and the mad.

    • Deadspacemoon says:

      Well it was good while it lasted dumb pubs and get good fat nerds ShaddFace

    • canned meatloaf says:

      King Raven who art in DRD, big be thy plays. Thy stream is live. Pubs will be crushed on Dire as they are in Radiant. Give us this stream our daily mad, and forgive us our 1v1 dodges, as we forgive those who dodge against us, and lead us not into 3k, but deliver us from publics. Solomid.

    • Doctorbh says:

      Slob will be back in a few months, 6000 games 4.1k MMR rocking back and forth.

    • fuck you hbcyber says:

      fuck you hbcyber. you just had to shit out another madcast you piece of shit.

    • zergbong says:

      I’m surprised Raven’s stream lasted as long as it did. I don’t blame him at all considering obsessed weirdos have been doxxing him and trying to harass him IRL. Hope you’re doing alright Raven.

    • JEABONG says:

      so who will we watch next kids ? moon just doesnt cut it :C

    • slobbuy cumhole says:

      looks like the king couldn’t bear the weight of the crown and had himself a little meltdown, deleted his twitch and all his vods.

      how long you guys think he can last before he comes crawling back and posting about his benz and streaming some 4k dota

    • Rahul says:

      Stream was good while it lasted

    • Shaddonius says:

      Fucking NerdRaven is more impredictable than a woman. You can never know when he’s gonna explode like this.

      IF YOU WEREN’T SUCH A DILDOBRO I WOULDN’T HAVE TO GET KIDRAGED.

    • JEABONG says:

      STREAM ALREADY KID RAVEN

      WELL YOU’RE JUST A TWO TIMING SLUT LANDFILL.

    • Rahul says:

      All of hbcybers madcasts are gone

    • Deadspacemoon says:

      MAD SLOBS:King Raven, who art in DRD; big be thy plays. Thy stream is live, pubs will be crushed on Dire as they are in Radiant. Give us this stream our daily mad, and forgive us our dodge bets, as we forgive those who dodge against us, and lead us not into 3k, but deliver us from publics. Solomid.

    • Demon_Steve says:

      Are you slobs actually praying for KR to come back? Come on kids, we all know there is no God.

    • Demon_Steve says:

      50 years from now, I think Daggius will be considered a classical blogger. He’s going to be the Shakespeare of our time. Daggius, please throw up the big stream kid so us pubs have something to watch after we’ve done the dishes and our mom and dad are down stairs watching fox news.

    • DSM Fag Parade says:

      What the fuck happened? Is this really the end?!!??! DSM asshole licker.

      YOUR UNCLE’S GOT A DUMPY FUCKBUTTHOLE AND WE ALL KNOW IT.

    • MOM, THE MEATLOAF! says:

      Ok, I just checked the Kings recent Games, he lost like every game (feeding himself, not his teammates).
      So we can say for sure now that ravens argument “I play worse when I am streaming” is invalid, it’s just as “good” when the stream is on.

      Also we all miss chatting with you, raven. It was always a fun and entertaining atmosphere and the amount of entertainment was way above any other twich channel.

      so Raven plz, give us back our favourite stream:
      King Raven, who art in DRD; big be thy plays. Thy stream is live, pubs will be crushed on Dire as they are in Radiant. Give us this stream our daily mad, and forgive us our dodge bets, as we forgive those who dodge against us, and lead us not into 3k, but deliver us from publics. Solomid.

      Also: Deadspacekid, get good at the game you shitty pub!

    • JEABONG says:

      King Raven, who art in DRD; big be thy plays. Thy stream is live, pubs will be crushed on Dire as they are in Radiant. Give us this stream our daily mad, and forgive us our dodge bets, as we forgive those who dodge against us, and lead us not into 3k, but deliver us from publics. Solomid.

    • Medium Sized Meng says:

      King Raven, who art in DRD; big be thy plays. Thy stream is live, pubs will be crushed on Dire as they are in Radiant. Give us this stream our daily mad, and forgive us our dodge bets, as we forgive those who dodge against us, and lead us not into 3k, but deliver us from publics. Solomid.

    • AngryBobs says:

      I hate to say it but I only followed two streamers on twitch one being Moon and the other being Raven. I am pretty disappointed I may not ever see the mad and rocking back and forth on a nightly basis. Hopefully he moves home and his mom makes him plenty of meatloaf so that he will have the energy and drive to start streaming again.

    • Demon_Steve says:

      At the end of the day, we all have better things to do, KR included. Move along pubs. This thread is closed.

    • JEABONG says:

      King Raven, who art in DRD; big be thy plays. Thy stream is live, pubs will be crushed on Dire as they are in Radiant. Give us this stream our daily mad, and forgive us our dodge bets, as we forgive those who dodge against us, and lead us not into 3k, but deliver us from publics. Solomid….

    • Trales says:

      Is anyone here good at the game?

      CALL THE RAGEDWEEB COMMITTEE FOR AN EXTRA BIG LOAF WIPING.

      • Deadspacemoon says:

        Not u Trales u strife playing dumb pub kid Keepo.
        CERTIFIED AND DO NOTHING ALL GAME TO BE GANKING YOUR SMALL SON DAD.

    • Rahul says:

      Hbcyber where u at son

    • JEABONG says:

      we need to send ShaddHitman after cyber kid

    LEAVE A COMMENT

    The DRD Insult Generator says:
      NOTHING TO SEE HERE, JUST A DO NOTHING ALL GAME CUNTBUTT ASS PIRATING HIS OWN PISSCLOWN IN THE MAP.


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